Most choices in life aren’t easy, if they were easy they wouldn’t be choices because they would just be the natural option, it is when you have several alternatives and don’t know what you want that you make a choice, and more often than not, it’s a hard one to make.
I believe in natural instincts, they tell you a lot about a person and when someone’s first instinct is to do whatever pushes you away, you reach a point where you can’t fight anymore, swimming against the current is just too hard.
Leaving someone you care for is never easy, but it’s even harder when you placed all your hopes and dreams on that person, when despite everything you still love them and made plans for a life together.
Choosing to leave all that you wished for behind is one of the hardest things I have ever had to do, but when you reach that point of no return, when you just can’t bear the hurt anymore, when the good no longer outweighs the bad, there really is no other option, because the alternative, to stay with someone who claims to love you but acts like he never did, that is no choice at all.
Actions speak louder than words ever could, and those three little words we all yearn for, completely lose their meaning when the person who says them is constantly breaking your heart. Lucky for me my heart can’t be broken anymore, because there is nothing left to break.
Starting over is hard to do, especially when you feel you have given everything in you and there is nothing left to give. As a rational adult I know that’s how it feels now but that won’t last forever, but as a hopeless romantic I wonder if I will ever be able to love this way again.
I think happy endings are like unicorns, something mythical and beautiful we hear about but never really get to see in the flesh, not me anyway, I have had happy moments and happy memories but never a happy ending, in my experience endings always tend to be sad.
Life, and especially relationships, are no fairytale, but just for one day, for my broken heart’s sake, I wish they were.
Until next time… Smooches to all xXx
